The Sole Survivor

The last kitten. He is the guy posted thru-out the blog. Such a sweet, friendly guy -and the only one alive. We've lost all of them. Even the daddy isn't around much anymore....think the last he was around was about 3 days ago - the sibling; gone. The momma cat comes and goes at spaced out intervals. Can't figure out what happened to the sibling. It was here, it was fine, so it seemed.... then one day, it didn't show up for the breakfast bunch. Never been seen or heard from again. The night before both were climbing my Charlie Brown tree, playing pretty hard. It was enjoyable to watch.

Vacation is almost over. I have a ton of homework to do tomorrow, and must get out to see Donnie tomorrow night. He's been in town from Nashville for about 3 or 4 weeks, and I've yet to get out there. I've done as much as I expected I would during vacation week - except ECheck. Forgot about ECheck. I still have two more days before back to work....could possibly get the ECheck Monday. Didn't get a haircut, needed that badly.

this class I am working on, is as hard as math! This is a class regarding research studies. My favorite subject, but definitely the most challenging!


top of mind thoughts:

The best proclamations of love are the ones that are equal parts practical and romantic.
(my sentiments exactly)

Horse Riding?

I could go Horse Riding this week? Haven't done that in ages? Wonder how that would feel? Free? Not sure it would bring about any passionate resources, but could still be something different and worthwhile. Let's see... where do you start?
I do need to go for a walk tomorrow. I'll start with the bike path -may take my roller blades? THEN there's the fact that I need to lay around the house ugly all day. Not getting dressed, on the couch with a blanket and a pillow -if it storms, I'll do that. Otherwise, I'll get out, and get busy. It's late now, I'll get to bed early so I don't miss much.

Think the mid-life crisis is real? It's always been said that the mid-life crisis brings about unusual events... divorce, puchase of a convertible, cavorting with people half your age? But what is it really? Could it be where you find the things that interested you while younger transform? They either change, or go to a higher level? I'll have to read up on some of those philosphy's. I've just began to experience what I find is a change of mind-set. It's time to find things that I can't wait to get out of bed to do. Of course after being injured so many years, it was all I could do to get out of bed. Now that I'm functional -I have to find some things that don't really push those points. What a freakin' puzzle.
Billy Bob Thornton is on tv-I like this guy. gotta go... ha Billy Bob just said what excites him now is sitting at home on his a**. He said hotels are just about paying lots of money to sleep in a bed that is not as good as his at home! Boy, I'm there with that. I knew I liked this guy. Think I'll go in the other room and watch Bad Santa; it's been recorded for mos and I've yet to watch it. We'll see if I can get thru it before I fall asleep.

I get to stay home alone now several nights a week. The boyfriend's mom is ill -so he spends time staying the night at her house. For safety purposes, and because, well, he should. He'll regret it, if he doesn't. Hate to capitalize on it, but I like this time. Especially while on vacation, and the 5 a.m. alarm clock not waiting on me!

Monday

Blah, Monday.
Yesterday ELEVEN hours of homework. What a drag. I must've gotten behind at some point, I didn't realize there would be so much to do, on due date. Yuck, I hate it. It's a degree I must have, again, I hate it.
The weather isn't nice, so I'm not missing much. The sun isn't out, the weather is muggy -I could stand a good storm or two. I LOVE storms.
Today I caught up (a little) on housework, then did the dreaded 3 mos dr's appt. Not much else accomplished. I have a week off work; several things I plan to do. Need to write a list to make sure I get them done. ECheck. Yeah, that sucks, the last year of ECheck -my car is what? only three years old and I have to get a freakin' ECheck. Whatever. It's the last one. I'll do that, then order my tags... after all my b'day is next month -which is the 20th anniversary of my 21st b'day.
Sounds more attractive than turning 41.
I remember when I was, oh say, 24 - I hung out with people that were in their early 40's and man, they hung out all night long with us. I can't imagine! How on earth did they do it? I couldn't. No way I could stay out til 4 in the morning and get to work by 7. I could do it at 24 -but at 41 puhleeze! It'd take a lot of passion to do that. That might be it. The passion is not there. You know passion can get you buy on 4 hours sleep. Lack of passion requires a good 10 hours easy!!
Passion; that's a entirely different subject. My Nashville friend and I have discussed it at length. Bach when, we were passionate about so many things. Things that drive you, and keep you moving forward. So, what's different now? Do you have to find other things you are passionate about -cause life changes? I've ventured around looking for things that might bring that sort of energy. Working out-yeah, it's good. But it's a requirement. Music; sure, but nothing new draws me like it did before. It's got to be out there, and I have to find it. This is my passionate pursuit. It may require moving. Maybe it's a geographical handicap? I've done so much, been there, done that -not easily entertained... maybe I need to be where the entertainment is fresh and new? Not sure, just something I'm pondering. It's not hobbies and interests I am referring to- it's passion. There is something very different about passion. Passion was when I was in radio -and I could work 24 hours a day. I never stopped working. You know, that leads me to a subject of interest-radio would put me back there. The way radio has transformed makes it that much more interesting. You can track out of your home, with a home studio and broadcast on 24 stations across the U.S. Set down tracks, upload to the respective cities - that, does start the creative juices flowing. But how do you get the news anchor job on Fox News?? That's what I really want !! Yeah, forgot to pave that path.

Saturday Jul 9th

The boyfriends' b'day. Busy day at work. It was one of those days where I performed just as to what is expected of me...Then sometimes, I was in the 'don't push me around mode.' Like your threats do not make you get what you are not entitled to. That's another story. Then I came home -we did the b'day dinner. However the gifts I ordered didn't come in. We picked up his son-no card, no gift. I'm feeling for the guy. No cards or gifts from the other two adult children either. He's 55, guess you don't expect much at this date. We have a mantel full of cards. After we get home from work, I decided to do some watering when I noticed a terrible smell. I've smelled it before. Once when I was 14 yrs old, a lady was laying dead during a heat wave in my neighborhood in Memphis. It was 113 degrees average for more than 14 days. The smell was incorrigible, sickening - news alerts advised to stay indoors, because of the heat primarily -but the smell !! You could puke at a moments notice.
So, back to 2005 - I smell this, only on a smaller level. I realize, it is the kitten the boyfriend named Frizzy. The only one he named. (these are stray kittens, see pics below.) We removed the skirting, used the flashlight and there he was. Oh, our feelings of guilt. But we must remove him. We wonder, had we checked sooner? Or was he intended to die? One less stray. The boyfriend grabs the shovel, changes clothes and crawls under the house. It's up to me to get it into the bag and tie it up, after we scoop up a mouse, the others have brought home as a prize. It is just sickening. It is sad. We are carrying away one of our own, it seems. We decide to take him to the dumpster, of my former employer. It's only 3 miles. That sad moment is over.

Came home, fed the other kittens and cats. BUT ....Later in the night Knock, Knock, Knock- on the sliding glass door. The boyfriend opens the door at my vocal protest to not answer it, this is not even the front door -but the sliding glass in the family room. The crack head wants to use the phone. The boyfriend hands it to her, I take it back !! He dials the number, no answer. Now I'm on their caller id. Later the police call, she is missing now for hours. She was pretty beat up. That was disturbing. Needless to say, I'm still awake. The police said they may want to speak with us later.(because they have my number/caller id)
IF we happen to be the last ones to see her. Crack heads will shoot you or rob you. I'm mad at the boyfriend for his indiscretion. AT the same time, not surprised.
It has been a long day. Not one I'd choose to do over. Lots of events within a few short hours. AT the same time people calling to get us out of the house. Sorry we're busy, we live here! On that note I'll go to bed. Tomorrow when I wake up-it's plenty of homework, and much laundry as well. I'm off til Wednesday....ah life can be good. Broke, but good. I took the day off without pay. Priorities. School needs attention. More later... oh, one of the strays came to my lap, it's a first. The Spunky one. (if you respond to a post, it comes to my email.)